Shortly after my daughter was born I started on this journey of painful discovery. Multiple panic attacks a day, lasting for months on end, sent me running to a counselor begging for answers to what was going on with my body. Little did I know I would spend hours upon hours in that room exposing lies and hurt that had been buried in the depths of my soul from childhood abuse. Lies that I had no idea even existed permeated every ounce of who I was as a person. These lies were so apart of my life I had no idea that they were even affecting who I was as a person. I had no idea that these lies gave explanation for so many deeply rooted fears in my life. There was a power these hidden lies possessed that I couldn’t even begin to explain.

Over the course of the last two years I have spent so much time digging into the depths of who I am at the very core exposing these lies. Reaching within me with every ounce of vulnerability I can muster up I have discovered why I respond to so many things the way I do. No matter how much pain it caused me I continued to dig deep within me to expose every corner that was hiding these lies because I couldn’t let them control me anymore. I couldn’t let these hidden lies permeate every ounce of who I am. I couldn’t let these lies keep from experiencing freedom. So I dug my feet in and I fought. I pushed forward and decided that as painful as it was to fight, leaving the lies in my life was more painful.

I’ll be honest, fighting and exposing the lies has probably been more painful than discovering their existence. So often I am blinded by how much the truth hurts. Despite all of this, I am constantly reminded of one thing, how much the Lord loves me.

God knew that this journey would be one of the most painful paths I have ever taken, but He also knew the freedom that awaits on the other side. God was never satisfied with the life I would live where those lies stayed hidden in the corners of my heart, He knew there was so much better for me. So He has come after me with an everlasting love and wrapped His arms around me as I fought this fight head on. He has fought for me. He has stood with me. He has cried for me. He has held me. He has never left, not one second. He has stood there the entire time reminding me that if I keep fighting, if I refuse to give up, there is freedom that awaits on the other side and it’s so much more than I could ever imagine.

God is standing right here and He is saying there is so much more. There is so much more than what I can see right now. There is so much more than the lies that have made their home in my heart for so long, and He wants me to experience that. He wants there to be more than what is right before me.

What’s incredible is He doesn’t just want that for me, He wants it for you too. Sometimes the Lord asks us to walk a really tough road. Sometimes the Lord asks us to fight a really hard fight. Sometimes we have to walk through hell before we can see what freedom awaits on the other side. Sometimes the effects of sin in this world can be so heavy and so crippling and we have to walk through it. But He is right there saying, just you wait and see what’s on the other side. Just you wait and see what freedom awaits you. Just keep pressing on, just keep pushing through, just keep your eyes on me and you will see. There is so much more, so much more.

There is so much more, sweet friend. We are so much more than the lies within our heart and God doesn’t want us to miss out on it. He wants us to experience just what that more is in each of our lives. He wants us to experience the power of what more He can do in our lives. He wants us to see that we are more than our past, more than our present, and much more than we can imagine simply because we are His.

Oh what a wonderful journey it is when we can be in constant discovery of being more. Sweet friend, you are more.