Bonding is a critical part of your relationship with your
child. That’s why all the books you read when pregnant talk about those
critical moments of mother bonding with child as soon as possible after birth.
There’s a special connection between a parent and child, but as with any
connection or relationship, if not nurtured it can easily dissipate.

As critical as it is to bond with your child within moments
of them entering the world, it is just as critical to continue bonding and
nurturing that relationship when you go home. Spending time with a baby looks a
lot different than spending time with an active child. They can’t move around
and jump and play, but interacting with them at their stage in life is still
possible. Bonding with a baby could be just simply your touch, your time with
them holding and talking to them. Sometimes that can be sitting down watching a
movie while holding them, but sometimes it means turning off all media and
truly giving your undivided attention to them. One thing I have learned so far
is even though my baby is still so little, he knows when you aren’t paying
attention to him, and he knows what to do to tell you he wants your attention.

For mothers, the bonding process isn’t as hard to achieve
because there is already a special connection that you and baby share from just
carrying that child during pregnancy. When you’re nursing and staying home with
your baby, that bonding experience is happening daily. But for dad’s, they have
to be more intentional, and you have to encourage them.

Lately, Jase has just wanted his mama. He spends all day
with me, I’m nursing him, and I’m laying him down for his naps. There is a
special connection between us, a relationship that is being nurtured as we spend
so much time together. His last nap of the night we usually have him in his
swing or cuddling with mommy and daddy. Since Chad hasn’t been home as much now
that he is working his new job, Jase hasn’t fallen asleep with him anymore.
Chad tries his best to get him to fall asleep, but after trying all he knows to
try he asks me to take him and Jase is asleep in a matter of minutes.

After reading this post that Tiffany, from the Dwelling Tree, guest posted on another
blog I follow, I knew I needed to do more than just let him try and bond with
Jase, I needed to encourage it. I needed to help him understand the things I am
learning with Jase, and allow him to do what works best for him. I knew deep
down it bothered him that he couldn’t get his son to sleep in his arms anymore,
and I knew deep down he missed that bonding experience. Ladies, we are blessed
with amazing men who want to be part of our child’s lives. We should encourage
them in developing their own special relationship with our children as well.

So this evening when I needed to get ready for church, I
left Jase with Chad. When Jase started to get fussy, I told Chad it was
probably nap time. Chad tried to get him to sleep, and it wouldn’t work. I left
him alone and allowed him to do what he wanted until he asked for me. I went in
the living room and lovingly showed my husband the ways Jase has liked to fall
asleep in a person’s arms recently, and told him he liked to be patted on his
back. Within minutes Jase had fallen asleep. I encouraged my husband and
reminded him that his son still loved him.

I know as mom’s we sometimes know our children best, that’s
how God gifted us. But our husband’s need that time with our children just as
much as we do. Encourage those moments with your children and your husband.
After all, good fathers are a rare thing these days. The more you can encourage
your husband as a father, the more he will feel like the best father in the
world. When you trust them to know what’s best for your children, he will trust
himself in knowing what’s best for your children.