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on September 11, 2017 · Leave a Comment

Jude {3 Months}

Happy 3 months to this sweet baby of ours! The more babies you have, the more you wish time would slow down, and the faster it goes. Every little stage brings so much fun, yet I think I am bound to forever have baby fever. The newborn stage is just SO special. The scrunchy snuggles before they can stretch out on you, why can’t that last a little bit longer? I do love getting more smiles and more sleep though, I guess that’s the upside, right?

Jude is smiling, kicking, swatting toys, never staying on his tummy long, and absolutely adores his brother and sister. He also kind of hates how loud they can be and lets us all know by the time 6PM rolls around and he is just plain DONE.

He had his first bottle this month and took it like a champ! He eats every 3 hours and still likes to bunch it all up at the end of the day. He takes his last feeding between 9:30-10 and falls right to sleep until at least 7AM. It’s a beautiful thing. He is still in our room at night since some nights he can be a little restless. He’ll be sharing with Jase so it may be awhile before we officially move him at night. He sleeps in their room during the day for naps though.

Jude LOVES attention and loves for you to sit there and talk to him. He also gets flustered easily when it comes to eating…I sure hope that little temper doesn’t carry on into toddler years. His eyes are definitely blue and I couldn’t be more happy! Three blue eyed babies has this mama pretty happy. Although, Chad is still holding out for a child with brown eyes, we’ll see about that one.

Jude also found his fists this month and if he doesn’t have his paci, he usually is sucking on his fists. He finally moved out of Newborn clothes. I packed them away literally the day he turned three months, so now we are in 0-3.

It’s already crazy to look back at these pictures and see just how much he has changed. i really think he looks a lot  like his big brother the older he gets. So crazy how that happens. The kids still absolutely adore him and insist on kissing and hugging him all day long. Whenever Jude is crying Jase says it’s because “he’s looking for his best friend Jase.” Doesn’t that just make your heart melt? Sure does mine. Elyse still calls him “Baby June” not sure how long that will stick.

Jude your a joy to have around and I am soaking every bit of you up. You remind me to slow down on the crazy days and savor what sitting there being fully present can do for the heart.

Until next month.

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Filed Under: Family, Ferg Littles, Jude Tagged With: Monthly Update

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You deserve to exist, with the same grace and love You deserve to exist, with the same grace and love that you so freely give to your family. It’s not just about holding space for them; it’s about holding space for you, too.

You don’t have to shrink yourself to make room for others.

You deserve to take up space too.
Sometimes, the habits that helped us survive becom Sometimes, the habits that helped us survive become the hardest to unlearn. Those patterns once kept you safe, but now you’re learning they don’t need to anymore. 

Give yourself grace—you’re unlearning survival. Healing takes time, and with each layer you peel back, you’re discovering the person you’ve always been beneath the survival.

And if you’re anything like me, you’ll really learn to love her. ❤️
✨ NEW SEASON ✨ I’m not a big fan of change. ✨ NEW SEASON ✨

I’m not a big fan of change. My nervous system gets all panicky and tends to over research every possibility that could take place. It likes to tell me safety is in the details. 

But I know that’s not true.

This year has been a big year of growth for me in this department. Trauma told me control was my safety, but the truth was all I ever had was a false sense of control. 

This year has offered plenty of opportunities for me to say, “Okay God, you have my yes, wherever that leads.”

No over research. No over analyzing. No predicting every possibility. No trying to control the outcome.

Just a heart that says, “Yes.” 

Even when I don’t understand. Even when I’m nervous how it will turn out. Even when it feels like right now isn’t bad. Even when my heart’s confused. 

Even when….

God has been asking us both a lot lately, “Do I have your yes, no matter what that looks like?” Friday was the end of a season for Chad working at the Appliance Guys, and today starts a new season of a new company. It was NOT an easy decision, and it came with a lot of tears (mainly from me - are you surprised?). His boss, where he’s been for the last almost six years, has been an incredible support for our family as we walked through some of the hardest seasons of our family. They will always hold a special place in our heart.

But God said “it’s time” and my faith-filled husband said “Yes.” I have to admit, I don’t envy how hard this decision was for him. It affects us both, yes. But he had to walk it out. And I’m so grateful for His leadership and faith to Jesus to step into the next season when there are so many unknowns.

Sometimes, all God wants to know is does He have our “YES” no matter what that means. No matter what that changes. 

May I live my life in a way that has an open heart to hear from God and a willingness to say “YES” even when….

(PS he was so thrilled I made him take this photo. 😂 But I know this season will be one we forever ever want to remember, because God always shows His faithfulness).
I wonder if they would have chosen life for her. I wonder if they would have chosen life for her.

I wonder if they would have seen what was growing inside of her, and the fight that was about to come on the other side, if they would have said her life was worth saving.

I wonder if they would have discounted her before she had a chance. 

I wonder if they would have made a prediction about her quality of life and deemed her not worth the cost.

I wonder if they would have saw the life saving measures she would need and decided that it was worse to let her live.

I wonder if they would have saw everything that could go wrong, the bleak prognosis, and compared her to statistics. 

I wonder if they would have made a choice to encourage a decision that robbed us all of the miracle we see today.

Whether 48 hours or 4 years - her life has changed mine for the better. It’s heartbreaking to think someone may have once told me she wasn’t worth it.

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