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on May 23, 2017 · Leave a Comment

Pregnancy Update {37 Weeks}

It’s been a bit quiet around here, hasn’t it? My energy is starting to decrease every day and I’ve had to let the blog take the backseat. As a work at home mom with two toddlers things get crazy and overwhelming pretty quick. I’ve missed writing in this space and I have a lot of good posts coming your way, but I have to divert as much energy as I can to where there is priority first.

We are just two weeks away from my scheduled C-Section, can you believe it? In two weeks I will have a sweet little newborn baby in my arms and I cannot wait!I can’t wait to see how Jude fits into this little family of ours and watch Jase and Elyse become big brother (again) and big sister.

I’ve been busy working ahead on work making sure everyone is set for me to take some time off. Trying to make sure my husband has all he needs done and help him work ahead as much as possible. I’ve got the final things for baby making their way into the mail and getting things ready to leave the kids with grandparents for a few days. If only I could have a house cleaner things would be much better! I have been trying to keep it as clean as possible just in case I go into labor before my scheduled C-Section.

37 Weeks

Baby: BOY!! Jude Alexander

Mommy: I don’t think I could even begin to say how ready I am! Jude has dropped and he’s pretty low, so my pain has returned and it’s really hard to move around right now. I’m trying to rest as much as possible now, soak up my little ones, and continue to get what I can done at home until he comes. My nesting fever has kicked into gear, I just want to get as much done as possible around the house and keep it as clean as I can until we have this baby. Especially if I happen to go into labor before my scheduled C-Section.

Big Brother: He is so ready. He keeps asking for baby Jude to come out and play with him. He wants to know how much longer, when he is coming, and when he can meet him. It’s surprising how much he talks about it. He is always a bit timid when things change, so I think the anticipation of the change is making him a bit nervous. I think once Jude is here, it will be much better for him.

Big Sister: I really have no concerns about this girl. She cannot wait to have a baby around. She adores babies and the more she sees them in public, the more my heart is assured she is going to do just great. She might tend to smother him though or try to feed him cheerios, so I am going to be on constant baby watch.

Cravings: I am not sure I am craving much now. I don’t have much of an appetite these days, and I just have so many acid problems. Everything I eat is so limited now!

Food Aversions: Everything with marinara sauce. It’s a sad, sad thing.

Looking forward to: Having this baby! I think the anticipation of the change is harder on the kids than him actually being here right now. They are ready for the change, looking forward to it, but just this in the middle wondering what it’s going to look like has everyone a bit nervous. I also think I’ll be able to be a lot more involved with the kids when I have him, so I can’t wait either!

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Filed Under: Family, Ferg Littles, Jude, Pregnancy Tagged With: Bumpdate, pregnancy, pregnancy update, Third Pregnancy

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You deserve to exist, with the same grace and love You deserve to exist, with the same grace and love that you so freely give to your family. It’s not just about holding space for them; it’s about holding space for you, too.

You don’t have to shrink yourself to make room for others.

You deserve to take up space too.
Sometimes, the habits that helped us survive becom Sometimes, the habits that helped us survive become the hardest to unlearn. Those patterns once kept you safe, but now you’re learning they don’t need to anymore. 

Give yourself grace—you’re unlearning survival. Healing takes time, and with each layer you peel back, you’re discovering the person you’ve always been beneath the survival.

And if you’re anything like me, you’ll really learn to love her. ❤️
✨ NEW SEASON ✨ I’m not a big fan of change. ✨ NEW SEASON ✨

I’m not a big fan of change. My nervous system gets all panicky and tends to over research every possibility that could take place. It likes to tell me safety is in the details. 

But I know that’s not true.

This year has been a big year of growth for me in this department. Trauma told me control was my safety, but the truth was all I ever had was a false sense of control. 

This year has offered plenty of opportunities for me to say, “Okay God, you have my yes, wherever that leads.”

No over research. No over analyzing. No predicting every possibility. No trying to control the outcome.

Just a heart that says, “Yes.” 

Even when I don’t understand. Even when I’m nervous how it will turn out. Even when it feels like right now isn’t bad. Even when my heart’s confused. 

Even when….

God has been asking us both a lot lately, “Do I have your yes, no matter what that looks like?” Friday was the end of a season for Chad working at the Appliance Guys, and today starts a new season of a new company. It was NOT an easy decision, and it came with a lot of tears (mainly from me - are you surprised?). His boss, where he’s been for the last almost six years, has been an incredible support for our family as we walked through some of the hardest seasons of our family. They will always hold a special place in our heart.

But God said “it’s time” and my faith-filled husband said “Yes.” I have to admit, I don’t envy how hard this decision was for him. It affects us both, yes. But he had to walk it out. And I’m so grateful for His leadership and faith to Jesus to step into the next season when there are so many unknowns.

Sometimes, all God wants to know is does He have our “YES” no matter what that means. No matter what that changes. 

May I live my life in a way that has an open heart to hear from God and a willingness to say “YES” even when….

(PS he was so thrilled I made him take this photo. 😂 But I know this season will be one we forever ever want to remember, because God always shows His faithfulness).
I wonder if they would have chosen life for her. I wonder if they would have chosen life for her.

I wonder if they would have seen what was growing inside of her, and the fight that was about to come on the other side, if they would have said her life was worth saving.

I wonder if they would have discounted her before she had a chance. 

I wonder if they would have made a prediction about her quality of life and deemed her not worth the cost.

I wonder if they would have saw the life saving measures she would need and decided that it was worse to let her live.

I wonder if they would have saw everything that could go wrong, the bleak prognosis, and compared her to statistics. 

I wonder if they would have made a choice to encourage a decision that robbed us all of the miracle we see today.

Whether 48 hours or 4 years - her life has changed mine for the better. It’s heartbreaking to think someone may have once told me she wasn’t worth it.

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