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on February 28, 2017 · Leave a Comment

Pregnancy Update {25 Weeks}

I still feel like we have so much time to go and it doesn’t necessarily feel like it’s going fast, but 14 weeks left sounds a lot better to me. We officially have the C-Section scheduled for June 6th at 9:15AM and I’ve been a little nervous. Everything was so perfect last time, but I have had nightmares about things going wrong this round. I have no idea why. I’ve just been really praying and trusting that God is in this and it will go smoothly.

I am nesting like crazy so I have kept busy with so many tasks around the house. We are hoping to get a bigger dresser for the boys’ room soon so that I can get all Jude’s laundry out and start putting it away. It’s going to be so special seeing him in some of Jase’s old clothes! When I am not doing baby type things, I am cleaning my house a hundred times a day. It’s sad. I just can’t sit still even though I really should.

25 Weeks

Baby: BOY!! Jude Alexander

Mommy: S.O.R.E! If I could shout that I would. Pregnancy wears on my pelvic area tremendously to where rolling over in bed, walking, and standing for long periods of time send me into immense pain. I am talking to my doctor about it next week because I think I actually might have a condition that happens in pregnancy with your pelvic bone, not serious, just majorly painful. So I’m hoping for some tips to combat it. But besides that I’m doing good. I have been nesting so much this pregnancy I wouldn’t be surprised if I finish everything by the end of March. Don’t judge.

Big Brother:So excited! We put the crib in his room to see how everything would fit and he was so excited about it. I was worried that he would feel like his space is invaded, but he keeps saying thank you for baby Jude’s bed. It’s pretty adorable. Jude won’t be in there at night for a while, but I like to have them take naps in their crib to get used to it which is why we went ahead and put it up.

Big Sister: She loves babies and is so nurturing, I really hope that says something for when Jude comes! We talk about him all the time, but I know it won’t click with her yet.

Cravings: Jelly Beans. Chocolate. Meat. Man child.

Food Aversions: Anything that causes acid. It’s so bad!

Looking forward to: Meeting this little guy! I just can’t wait! My next appointment is the glucose test and I am so ready to get that over with. Anyone else ever freak out about passing it? *gulp* Wish me luck!

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Filed Under: Family, Ferg Littles, Jude, Pregnancy Tagged With: Bumpdate, pregnancy, pregnancy update, Third Pregnancy

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You deserve to exist, with the same grace and love You deserve to exist, with the same grace and love that you so freely give to your family. It’s not just about holding space for them; it’s about holding space for you, too.

You don’t have to shrink yourself to make room for others.

You deserve to take up space too.
Sometimes, the habits that helped us survive becom Sometimes, the habits that helped us survive become the hardest to unlearn. Those patterns once kept you safe, but now you’re learning they don’t need to anymore. 

Give yourself grace—you’re unlearning survival. Healing takes time, and with each layer you peel back, you’re discovering the person you’ve always been beneath the survival.

And if you’re anything like me, you’ll really learn to love her. ❤️
✨ NEW SEASON ✨ I’m not a big fan of change. ✨ NEW SEASON ✨

I’m not a big fan of change. My nervous system gets all panicky and tends to over research every possibility that could take place. It likes to tell me safety is in the details. 

But I know that’s not true.

This year has been a big year of growth for me in this department. Trauma told me control was my safety, but the truth was all I ever had was a false sense of control. 

This year has offered plenty of opportunities for me to say, “Okay God, you have my yes, wherever that leads.”

No over research. No over analyzing. No predicting every possibility. No trying to control the outcome.

Just a heart that says, “Yes.” 

Even when I don’t understand. Even when I’m nervous how it will turn out. Even when it feels like right now isn’t bad. Even when my heart’s confused. 

Even when….

God has been asking us both a lot lately, “Do I have your yes, no matter what that looks like?” Friday was the end of a season for Chad working at the Appliance Guys, and today starts a new season of a new company. It was NOT an easy decision, and it came with a lot of tears (mainly from me - are you surprised?). His boss, where he’s been for the last almost six years, has been an incredible support for our family as we walked through some of the hardest seasons of our family. They will always hold a special place in our heart.

But God said “it’s time” and my faith-filled husband said “Yes.” I have to admit, I don’t envy how hard this decision was for him. It affects us both, yes. But he had to walk it out. And I’m so grateful for His leadership and faith to Jesus to step into the next season when there are so many unknowns.

Sometimes, all God wants to know is does He have our “YES” no matter what that means. No matter what that changes. 

May I live my life in a way that has an open heart to hear from God and a willingness to say “YES” even when….

(PS he was so thrilled I made him take this photo. 😂 But I know this season will be one we forever ever want to remember, because God always shows His faithfulness).
I wonder if they would have chosen life for her. I wonder if they would have chosen life for her.

I wonder if they would have seen what was growing inside of her, and the fight that was about to come on the other side, if they would have said her life was worth saving.

I wonder if they would have discounted her before she had a chance. 

I wonder if they would have made a prediction about her quality of life and deemed her not worth the cost.

I wonder if they would have saw the life saving measures she would need and decided that it was worse to let her live.

I wonder if they would have saw everything that could go wrong, the bleak prognosis, and compared her to statistics. 

I wonder if they would have made a choice to encourage a decision that robbed us all of the miracle we see today.

Whether 48 hours or 4 years - her life has changed mine for the better. It’s heartbreaking to think someone may have once told me she wasn’t worth it.

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