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on February 1, 2016 · Leave a Comment

Elyse {10 Months}

Ten months, how in the world can I be typing those words? What an incredible ten months it has been. It never gets old watching a baby grow right before your eyes. Seeing them learn to crawl, learn to talk, learn to play, it’s just such an incredible journey to be a part of.

We have STILL been battling sickness this month, so that hasn’t been fun. But aside from that little girl is on the move. She is mostly crawling on her hands and knees now. Occasionally she will determine that she can get somewhere much faster if she army crawls and takes off. She is very brave. She takes off down the hallway all on her own and if you aren’t quick she’ll find herself something to get into. She is pulling to standing and thinks it’s the funniest thing ever. She’s not tried to cruise along anything yet though.

Her smile is contagious. This little girl probably has the most adorable grin I have ever seen and her eyes sparkle every time she smiles. It’s a real heart throb. She LOVES to dance. Turn on some music and she starts dancing away. Hopefully that means there will be some dance classes in her future.

I do think I might have a picky eater on my hands, so that is going to be fun. What I have gotten her to eat has been little, and she also seems to be a mood eater. One day she likes something, the next she doesn’t. I am really hoping the more I keep trying the more she will grow out of it. I hope…

I cannot believe I am already making first birthday plans for little miss, the last ten months have flown by!

Little Miss,


You bring so much joy in our life and watching you grow has been so much fun. It always amazes me seeing you discover the world before you. You are way more brave than I anticipated with how attached to mama you are, I have to watch you close! You adore your big brother and are really holding your own with him. We have enjoyed lots of snuggles this month since you haven’t been feeling well and, although exhausting, I have soaked up every second. It won’t be long before you’re running around and I can’t get you to sit still. I am SO excited to plan your first birthday in a couple months, but also wish time would slow down. If only I could have it both ways. Just slow down a little, okay?


Until next month,


Mommy.


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Filed Under: Elyse, Family, Ferg Littles Tagged With: Monthly Update

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You deserve to exist, with the same grace and love You deserve to exist, with the same grace and love that you so freely give to your family. It’s not just about holding space for them; it’s about holding space for you, too.

You don’t have to shrink yourself to make room for others.

You deserve to take up space too.
Sometimes, the habits that helped us survive becom Sometimes, the habits that helped us survive become the hardest to unlearn. Those patterns once kept you safe, but now you’re learning they don’t need to anymore. 

Give yourself grace—you’re unlearning survival. Healing takes time, and with each layer you peel back, you’re discovering the person you’ve always been beneath the survival.

And if you’re anything like me, you’ll really learn to love her. ❤️
✨ NEW SEASON ✨ I’m not a big fan of change. ✨ NEW SEASON ✨

I’m not a big fan of change. My nervous system gets all panicky and tends to over research every possibility that could take place. It likes to tell me safety is in the details. 

But I know that’s not true.

This year has been a big year of growth for me in this department. Trauma told me control was my safety, but the truth was all I ever had was a false sense of control. 

This year has offered plenty of opportunities for me to say, “Okay God, you have my yes, wherever that leads.”

No over research. No over analyzing. No predicting every possibility. No trying to control the outcome.

Just a heart that says, “Yes.” 

Even when I don’t understand. Even when I’m nervous how it will turn out. Even when it feels like right now isn’t bad. Even when my heart’s confused. 

Even when….

God has been asking us both a lot lately, “Do I have your yes, no matter what that looks like?” Friday was the end of a season for Chad working at the Appliance Guys, and today starts a new season of a new company. It was NOT an easy decision, and it came with a lot of tears (mainly from me - are you surprised?). His boss, where he’s been for the last almost six years, has been an incredible support for our family as we walked through some of the hardest seasons of our family. They will always hold a special place in our heart.

But God said “it’s time” and my faith-filled husband said “Yes.” I have to admit, I don’t envy how hard this decision was for him. It affects us both, yes. But he had to walk it out. And I’m so grateful for His leadership and faith to Jesus to step into the next season when there are so many unknowns.

Sometimes, all God wants to know is does He have our “YES” no matter what that means. No matter what that changes. 

May I live my life in a way that has an open heart to hear from God and a willingness to say “YES” even when….

(PS he was so thrilled I made him take this photo. 😂 But I know this season will be one we forever ever want to remember, because God always shows His faithfulness).
I wonder if they would have chosen life for her. I wonder if they would have chosen life for her.

I wonder if they would have seen what was growing inside of her, and the fight that was about to come on the other side, if they would have said her life was worth saving.

I wonder if they would have discounted her before she had a chance. 

I wonder if they would have made a prediction about her quality of life and deemed her not worth the cost.

I wonder if they would have saw the life saving measures she would need and decided that it was worse to let her live.

I wonder if they would have saw everything that could go wrong, the bleak prognosis, and compared her to statistics. 

I wonder if they would have made a choice to encourage a decision that robbed us all of the miracle we see today.

Whether 48 hours or 4 years - her life has changed mine for the better. It’s heartbreaking to think someone may have once told me she wasn’t worth it.

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