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on December 17, 2014 · 1 Comment

Jase 18 Months

I cannot believe I am saying happy 18 months to my little man. This officially means that you are closer to turning two, than you are to being one now. I might need some tissue over that little truth today. Also, I think I deserve credit because I am actually getting this up on the day you turn 18 months. It’s about time, I know.

This month has been adventurous. You had your first ever ER trip this month, and I wish I could say it hopefully the last, but knowing that I have an adventurous little boy on my hands pretty much tells me that’s not going to happen. You randomly spiked a 104.6 fever out of nowhere, very scary moment. I had never seen you so sick, and hot, and sleepy. They had to give you some fluids because you were refusing to drink anything all day, so we spent all day there and just found out you had a pretty awful virus. It was a long day.

You are an adventurous little man. You go in the Chick-Fil-A play place with no fear. You think it’s funny to try to step off of steps that are a little too high for you, mostly resulting in you falling, but you think it’s so funny. You love to wrestle, and make train noises, and run around in circles and crash on the floor. You are entirely all boy. Your favorite toy is your little alphabet train, and the batteries have been dead for the last week which has not made you very happy. You also still love your Crazy Coup car, you yell bye, and shut yourself in the car and pretend you’re driving away. Your imagination is so sweet.

You are learning new words like crazy! I left sign language off your update this month because we have mostly moved away from that and you are using words now. Sometimes you sign at the same time as saying words, but you are usually always talking. You pick up words so quickly now, it’s crazy. I love the way you say “juice” and “thank you.” You tell us “thank you” every time you give us something and every time we give you something. You are just soaking up every ounce of learning it is so fun to watch.

You are obsessed with throwing things away. You think you are throwing away trash, and mostly you actually do a good job. You find a cheerio you drop and you throw it away, that is if you don’t eat it. You find fuzz on the ground, you throw it away. But you also like to take the hooks off the ornaments and throw the hooks away and set the ornaments back in the tree. We also found one of daddy’s movies in the trash today, apparently you don’t like the Three Stooges.
You have also grown very attached to your pacifier all of a sudden. Since you were one, you haven’t had it during the day, except for when you were sick. I usually leave it in your crib and you have it at naps and bedtime only. It has really helped you talk more, but lately you have been asking for it. When I tell you now, you have the biggest meltdown ever. Not sure what caused you to be so attached to it all of a sudden, but you are.

I think you may be sensing change coming a little, and there is definitely going to be a big change for you. But I know you are going to be a great big brother and I cannot wait to see you and Elyse playing one day. I am so thankful that I get to be your mama, and I know you are going to do great with all the change coming. We will make it through. For now, I am trying to soak up every moment with you, yet still teaching you to play alone at the same time. In just under four months we will be welcoming your little sister. I am so proud to have you as my little man, until next month peanut.

Love,

Mommy

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Filed Under: Family, Ferg Littles, Jase Tagged With: Family, Ferg Littles, Jase, Jase Monthly Update Year 2

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Comments

  1. Heather Leigh says

    December 19, 2014 at 7:28 PM

    Oh girl! He just gets cuter and cuter every month!

    Reply

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You deserve to exist, with the same grace and love You deserve to exist, with the same grace and love that you so freely give to your family. It’s not just about holding space for them; it’s about holding space for you, too.

You don’t have to shrink yourself to make room for others.

You deserve to take up space too.
Sometimes, the habits that helped us survive becom Sometimes, the habits that helped us survive become the hardest to unlearn. Those patterns once kept you safe, but now you’re learning they don’t need to anymore. 

Give yourself grace—you’re unlearning survival. Healing takes time, and with each layer you peel back, you’re discovering the person you’ve always been beneath the survival.

And if you’re anything like me, you’ll really learn to love her. ❤️
✨ NEW SEASON ✨ I’m not a big fan of change. ✨ NEW SEASON ✨

I’m not a big fan of change. My nervous system gets all panicky and tends to over research every possibility that could take place. It likes to tell me safety is in the details. 

But I know that’s not true.

This year has been a big year of growth for me in this department. Trauma told me control was my safety, but the truth was all I ever had was a false sense of control. 

This year has offered plenty of opportunities for me to say, “Okay God, you have my yes, wherever that leads.”

No over research. No over analyzing. No predicting every possibility. No trying to control the outcome.

Just a heart that says, “Yes.” 

Even when I don’t understand. Even when I’m nervous how it will turn out. Even when it feels like right now isn’t bad. Even when my heart’s confused. 

Even when….

God has been asking us both a lot lately, “Do I have your yes, no matter what that looks like?” Friday was the end of a season for Chad working at the Appliance Guys, and today starts a new season of a new company. It was NOT an easy decision, and it came with a lot of tears (mainly from me - are you surprised?). His boss, where he’s been for the last almost six years, has been an incredible support for our family as we walked through some of the hardest seasons of our family. They will always hold a special place in our heart.

But God said “it’s time” and my faith-filled husband said “Yes.” I have to admit, I don’t envy how hard this decision was for him. It affects us both, yes. But he had to walk it out. And I’m so grateful for His leadership and faith to Jesus to step into the next season when there are so many unknowns.

Sometimes, all God wants to know is does He have our “YES” no matter what that means. No matter what that changes. 

May I live my life in a way that has an open heart to hear from God and a willingness to say “YES” even when….

(PS he was so thrilled I made him take this photo. 😂 But I know this season will be one we forever ever want to remember, because God always shows His faithfulness).
I wonder if they would have chosen life for her. I wonder if they would have chosen life for her.

I wonder if they would have seen what was growing inside of her, and the fight that was about to come on the other side, if they would have said her life was worth saving.

I wonder if they would have discounted her before she had a chance. 

I wonder if they would have made a prediction about her quality of life and deemed her not worth the cost.

I wonder if they would have saw the life saving measures she would need and decided that it was worse to let her live.

I wonder if they would have saw everything that could go wrong, the bleak prognosis, and compared her to statistics. 

I wonder if they would have made a choice to encourage a decision that robbed us all of the miracle we see today.

Whether 48 hours or 4 years - her life has changed mine for the better. It’s heartbreaking to think someone may have once told me she wasn’t worth it.

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