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on August 20, 2014 · 1 Comment

Jase 13.14 Month Letter

I debated on whether or not I was going to continue to do
monthly updates with Jase once we passed the one year mark, but I have decided
there is just so much growth and change happening still, I want to remember
these moments. For all those who despise when people continue to reference
their child’s age in months after they’ve lived a year, you may just want to
skip my posts on (or around) the seventeenth of every month. 😉

I missed little man’s 13 month post because we were
traveling to see family. When we returned from vacation things have just been
full speed ahead with ministry plans for the fall, hence my absence on the blog
recently. So this month I will be combining the two updates.

Jase took his first steps on July 7th which was
an incredibly exciting moment. I don’t think I will forget the look on his
face, the pure astonishment at what he had just realized his feet were capable
of doing. It was beyond precious. Since that day he has been full speed ahead.
Once he realized that he could walk, he has not stopped. It has taken this mama
a lot longer to come to terms with her little boy walking; I still cannot
believe how fast the days go. We have been teaching him sign language to help
him better communicate instead of screaming or crying when he wants something.
He has quite a handful of words now as well. He is obsessed with climbing on
anything and everything he can which results in quite a few tumbling incidents
– I am telling you, he is all BOY!

It has been such a precious treasure watching him grow into
this wobbly little toddler, and I am so thankful to all of you who have been a
part of his little life watching him grow here through the blog, and in real
life too!

To my little Peanut,

I cannot believe you are walking! The first year of life
really goes by as fast as they say. There is so much change, so many milestones
being reached, so many new things being achieved it just makes everything go so
fast. You have been quite the bundle of joy. You look so much like your daddy,
but act so much like your mommy; still to this very day. You love to be the
center of attention and you love to make people laugh. I can only imagine what
you are going to be like when you start school one day. You are known
everywhere you go for the crazy noises you make; they’re so crazy I don’t even
know how to describe them. Your grandpa nicknamed you Velociraptor while he was
here to visit last week; I think that is probably the closest way to describe
those little noises you make.

You absolutely love your mommy and daddy. During vacation,
we would bring you into bed with us in the morning and you would play, then you
would come back and put your head against mommy, and then your head against
daddy – your way of giving us hugs. You would do this over and over again in
between playing. One day, you grabbed your daddy’s face, and your mommy’s face,
brought us together and gave us both your little hug. It’s these moments that
just overwhelm my heart with so much love. Sometimes I just look at you
playing, or laughing, or talking and tears feel my eyes – I love you something
fierce, little man.

You LOVE to play hide and seek. Your dad and I could play it
with you for hours and you would laugh every time you find us, and so would we.
You love to read books, and have even started reading them to yourself. I
wonder what you are saying. I love the way you say “hiiiiii” as your drag out
your “I” with a huge cheesy grin on your face. When you first learned this word
you would walk in circles between the rooms in our house, and every time you
entered the room we were in you would let out a big “hiiiiii!” It is so much
fun watching you grow and learn every day. I cannot wait to see the little boy
that you grow into. But at the same time, little peanut, slow down, don’t grow
up to fast. Until next month….

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Filed Under: Ferg Littles, Jase Tagged With: Family, Ferg Littles, Jase, Jase Monthly Update Year 2

Previous Post: « TLM & His First Steps
Next Post: Party of Two »

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Comments

  1. Chelle @ GlitterStitchStudio says

    August 24, 2014 at 5:28 AM

    I have one of those rulers too! I can't wait to capture all his birthdays on it, poor Cole just got on there at year 14 wish I had one sooner. It really goes sooo fast. I just want to freeze time. I saw your pictures of family visits! I hope you had a good time.

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You deserve to exist, with the same grace and love You deserve to exist, with the same grace and love that you so freely give to your family. It’s not just about holding space for them; it’s about holding space for you, too.

You don’t have to shrink yourself to make room for others.

You deserve to take up space too.
Sometimes, the habits that helped us survive becom Sometimes, the habits that helped us survive become the hardest to unlearn. Those patterns once kept you safe, but now you’re learning they don’t need to anymore. 

Give yourself grace—you’re unlearning survival. Healing takes time, and with each layer you peel back, you’re discovering the person you’ve always been beneath the survival.

And if you’re anything like me, you’ll really learn to love her. ❤️
✨ NEW SEASON ✨ I’m not a big fan of change. ✨ NEW SEASON ✨

I’m not a big fan of change. My nervous system gets all panicky and tends to over research every possibility that could take place. It likes to tell me safety is in the details. 

But I know that’s not true.

This year has been a big year of growth for me in this department. Trauma told me control was my safety, but the truth was all I ever had was a false sense of control. 

This year has offered plenty of opportunities for me to say, “Okay God, you have my yes, wherever that leads.”

No over research. No over analyzing. No predicting every possibility. No trying to control the outcome.

Just a heart that says, “Yes.” 

Even when I don’t understand. Even when I’m nervous how it will turn out. Even when it feels like right now isn’t bad. Even when my heart’s confused. 

Even when….

God has been asking us both a lot lately, “Do I have your yes, no matter what that looks like?” Friday was the end of a season for Chad working at the Appliance Guys, and today starts a new season of a new company. It was NOT an easy decision, and it came with a lot of tears (mainly from me - are you surprised?). His boss, where he’s been for the last almost six years, has been an incredible support for our family as we walked through some of the hardest seasons of our family. They will always hold a special place in our heart.

But God said “it’s time” and my faith-filled husband said “Yes.” I have to admit, I don’t envy how hard this decision was for him. It affects us both, yes. But he had to walk it out. And I’m so grateful for His leadership and faith to Jesus to step into the next season when there are so many unknowns.

Sometimes, all God wants to know is does He have our “YES” no matter what that means. No matter what that changes. 

May I live my life in a way that has an open heart to hear from God and a willingness to say “YES” even when….

(PS he was so thrilled I made him take this photo. 😂 But I know this season will be one we forever ever want to remember, because God always shows His faithfulness).
I wonder if they would have chosen life for her. I wonder if they would have chosen life for her.

I wonder if they would have seen what was growing inside of her, and the fight that was about to come on the other side, if they would have said her life was worth saving.

I wonder if they would have discounted her before she had a chance. 

I wonder if they would have made a prediction about her quality of life and deemed her not worth the cost.

I wonder if they would have saw the life saving measures she would need and decided that it was worse to let her live.

I wonder if they would have saw everything that could go wrong, the bleak prognosis, and compared her to statistics. 

I wonder if they would have made a choice to encourage a decision that robbed us all of the miracle we see today.

Whether 48 hours or 4 years - her life has changed mine for the better. It’s heartbreaking to think someone may have once told me she wasn’t worth it.

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