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on October 21, 2013 · 1 Comment

Grace Restores

 photo 250x250.jpg

 

There was a season of life where I lost a really good friend
to some petty childish accusations. I was falsely accused of something and
slandered behind my back on a constant basis. I was hurt, very hurt. I cried at
least three times a week about the same thing. I would cry out to God in tears
during my devotions just trying to find what I had done wrong. Were these
accusations true? Did I do something wrong? I would spend hour upon hour in
tears with my husband trying to figure out why this was happening. I called a
close friend and sought counsel again and again. Every time I thought I had
moved on from the friendship, where I thought I had come to terms with the end
of that season, I would cry again. I had to see this person countless times on
a weekly basis, so it made it even that much harder to let go of a friendship I
held so dear to my heart on something that felt so stupid, but I had no control
over it. Still, to this day I don’t understand why God had me go through that
season. I don’t know if I ever will.
 
But I know that it is God’s grace that restored me.
 
In the moments that we have no idea why we are facing the
storm we find ourselves in, God’s grace restores us. He picks up the pieces of
our broken heart and He puts that back together. He reminds us in those moments
that He knows the pain of a broken heart, He knows the ache we feel, and His
grace is all we need for restoration.
 
It is God’s grace that restored my heart from a shattered
friendship. When I look back over my life I can see time and time again where
God picked up the broken pieces in my life and restored them. His grace
restores me time and time again.
 
“And the God of all grace, who called you to his eternal
glory in Christ, after you have suffered a little while, will himself restore
you and make you strong, firm and steadfast.” 1 Peter 5:10
  

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Filed Under: Faith Tagged With: 31 Days 2013, Faith

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Comments

  1. Mer in America says

    October 22, 2013 at 12:40 AM

    I needed to read this today…thanks:) I am sorry about your friendship ending but I love your outlook on this situation and faith in God to put yourself back together again. Have a good week!

    Reply

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You deserve to exist, with the same grace and love You deserve to exist, with the same grace and love that you so freely give to your family. It’s not just about holding space for them; it’s about holding space for you, too.

You don’t have to shrink yourself to make room for others.

You deserve to take up space too.
Sometimes, the habits that helped us survive becom Sometimes, the habits that helped us survive become the hardest to unlearn. Those patterns once kept you safe, but now you’re learning they don’t need to anymore. 

Give yourself grace—you’re unlearning survival. Healing takes time, and with each layer you peel back, you’re discovering the person you’ve always been beneath the survival.

And if you’re anything like me, you’ll really learn to love her. ❤️
✨ NEW SEASON ✨ I’m not a big fan of change. ✨ NEW SEASON ✨

I’m not a big fan of change. My nervous system gets all panicky and tends to over research every possibility that could take place. It likes to tell me safety is in the details. 

But I know that’s not true.

This year has been a big year of growth for me in this department. Trauma told me control was my safety, but the truth was all I ever had was a false sense of control. 

This year has offered plenty of opportunities for me to say, “Okay God, you have my yes, wherever that leads.”

No over research. No over analyzing. No predicting every possibility. No trying to control the outcome.

Just a heart that says, “Yes.” 

Even when I don’t understand. Even when I’m nervous how it will turn out. Even when it feels like right now isn’t bad. Even when my heart’s confused. 

Even when….

God has been asking us both a lot lately, “Do I have your yes, no matter what that looks like?” Friday was the end of a season for Chad working at the Appliance Guys, and today starts a new season of a new company. It was NOT an easy decision, and it came with a lot of tears (mainly from me - are you surprised?). His boss, where he’s been for the last almost six years, has been an incredible support for our family as we walked through some of the hardest seasons of our family. They will always hold a special place in our heart.

But God said “it’s time” and my faith-filled husband said “Yes.” I have to admit, I don’t envy how hard this decision was for him. It affects us both, yes. But he had to walk it out. And I’m so grateful for His leadership and faith to Jesus to step into the next season when there are so many unknowns.

Sometimes, all God wants to know is does He have our “YES” no matter what that means. No matter what that changes. 

May I live my life in a way that has an open heart to hear from God and a willingness to say “YES” even when….

(PS he was so thrilled I made him take this photo. 😂 But I know this season will be one we forever ever want to remember, because God always shows His faithfulness).
I wonder if they would have chosen life for her. I wonder if they would have chosen life for her.

I wonder if they would have seen what was growing inside of her, and the fight that was about to come on the other side, if they would have said her life was worth saving.

I wonder if they would have discounted her before she had a chance. 

I wonder if they would have made a prediction about her quality of life and deemed her not worth the cost.

I wonder if they would have saw the life saving measures she would need and decided that it was worse to let her live.

I wonder if they would have saw everything that could go wrong, the bleak prognosis, and compared her to statistics. 

I wonder if they would have made a choice to encourage a decision that robbed us all of the miracle we see today.

Whether 48 hours or 4 years - her life has changed mine for the better. It’s heartbreaking to think someone may have once told me she wasn’t worth it.

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